Friday, October 9, 2015

Overwhelmed.


I am hurting so bad right now. I want to scream. I feel childish for being so upset but I am. I celebrate my New Years on Halloween. I am a new witch but I am learning more about it and my path everyday. I was so excited for Halloween because I was going to get dressed up with Ally, take her Trick or Treating, then come home to have cake and teach her about New Years and what it means to me.

Now it's turned into this horrible thing. The new woman is invited along. My ex is coming. His other daughter is coming. I just can't do it. It was supposed to be a special day for Mommy and her.

The financial problems are stacking up quickly. I feel knee deep in this shit. I can't do it. I just want to cry but my chest hurts so bad I couldn't cry if I wanted to.

Will things really be okay? Why did he have to come home and shake everything up?

7 comments:

  1. I'm not letting Brittany around her. So Bella won't be going even if I have to stay home from work. I know that seems childish. But I just can't....

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    1. I don't know anymore Kris. I just wanted my day with her and I was okay with him and Izzy tagging along but now it feels like a circus and I can't say how I feel without it being a huge fight. Like right now, Ally has a fever and I can't get ahold of her father to tell me because who knows where he's really at tonight.

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  2. I haven't been able to get a hold of him either. I think bella has another upper respiratory infection, thank God I still have her amoxicillin. I've gotten 2 texts since he left at 7. You have a right to refuse to let her around Brittany.

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    1. It's not worth being screamed at. I had a 12 hr anxiety attack last night my chest is still killing me. I just want to understand why they both came back.

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  3. Me too. Since he's been home I've been having 3-5 panic attacks a day. It honestly feels like im having a panic attack. I can't handle their bullshit anymore.

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  4. I know if I was in your situation I would be feeling the exact same way but you should try to make the most of it as hard as that is going to be and let Ally see that you guys can all get along. I know it isn't perfect but what if you guys kept celebrating after she got back home again. She would probably feel like the luckiest little girl in the world to be still celebrating Halloween. I know this whole situation is hard but you can do it!!

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  5. Honestly.... He has been neglecting his responsibilities of both girls since day one. He's not an active part of their lives and proved last night by turning his phone on silent that he doesn't care either way if something happens to them, seeing as they both got sick last night and neither one of us could get a hold of him. He's never held down a steady job, hasn't paid you child support, hasn't helped me with bella, and constantly just up and dips. I hate to say it. But he needs his rights stripped of both girls. He's never gonna change Felicia. We both know that. He will be going to jail soon for nonpayment of child support. We don't need him and just from him being gone all that time out of state, the girls don't need him either.

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