Today I am actually able to spend time on my laptop in between loads of laundry. I have decided to make quite a few changes, Instead of doing one HUGE post, I am splitting this into a series. All parts will be posted so be sure to scroll to part one to begin with. This series will include my overall action plan, exercise, cleaning, and diet.
Today was a blast! Ally made a new friend, I got time out of the house, and now I am getting things done around the house.
I have always been one of those people that constantly asks why. I don't like when decisions are made and there is no explanation as to why. My ex is in an odd place himself and its usually when he loses himself that he is in his most honest form. I know there were many problems that his family had with me during my stay there. The biggest being that I was lazy.
In a recent conversation that I had with him I asked him about the contributing factors on his end as far as the end of our marriage. His being that I let my depression swallow me instead of using it to drive me to better myself. In order for me to fully move forward I have to know what was holding me back to begin with.
We are in the midst of deep cleaning the apartment right now. Before I go to work tomorrow I will be finishing up cleaning and then starting a daily chore list. I am hoping by having one place to focus each day it will help me not to feel so overwhelmed.
I have decided to simplify my life. I am only going to have one blog. This blog is going to not only include my day to day life but also my cross stitch, Tarot, and weight loss. This is to help ease my stress.
I have noticed that I crave structure but it isn't always easy for me to keep. I am bad about getting into the habit and then fading out because I have one bad day. I have also noticed that I keep swearing I am going to stop involving myself and then eventually I get back into the drama. I have been really good about ignoring the petty stabs though and focusing on me. I have to always remember my why. Why am I doing this?
I am doing this to be the best version of myself. I am doing this because somewhere in the last four years I lost myself and it's been almost a year. I am finally gaining confidence and moving forward. I just need to keep my drive and keep pushing forward.