I have been struggling very hard to just keep my mouth shut but after today's and yesterday's events I feel the need to come forward and talk.
I never expected things to come to end the way they have. I tried to help and I'll be honest, there was jealously there when they first started living together as a couple but after our last pow wow I received the clarity I needed. I was able to leave those feelings and move forward. I'm not completely where I need to be but everyday I get a little closer.
Yet again I believed I could have a healthy relationship with my step-son. I've loved Damian from the moment Brit let me feel him move. I tell you this hurts worse than a miscarriage.
I also found myself being more honest than usual because usually I run from confrontations but today as I spoke to Joey I gave myself plenty of reflection time and it felt like a slap in the face.
I've said horrible things to Brit and Joey both. Lashed out in a moment of anger and regretted the words instantly. I've never followed through with my threats. I could have lost Ally today and this has given me refocus.
Every move I make is for her. I refuse to settle for anything less than our happiness. I'm always going to love and support Ally no matter what.
Tomorrow will be a hard day on all of us but hopefully this will bring closure and these wounds will eventually be just scars of a distant memory.