Friday, September 30, 2016

Final Decision and Changes Ahead

Blogging has been my go to community since 2014. I have changed so much since I began blogging and I am forever grateful to my MIL for showing me what I was missing out on. I've felt the shift in the community for some time now and I've been determined to have an outlet for my thoughts. I am realizing now that some of those thoughts are best left to myself.

I want to start by apologizing for bringing my personal life to light in such an ugly way. I know that J feels like I had no right to blast our conversation but I feel like the other two women deserve to see his true colors. I also know love is blind and after my talk with him today I feel very sorry for both women who still believe he is with them emotionally or mentally because he is neither.

I will also say that I am going to provide some clarity because I feel like my reasons and opinions have been distorted and are making me out to be a far worse person than I really am. I am told that I am the reason for Ally not being contacted. I call bull, if I were to get a phone call and was told you wanted to speak to Ally, I'd give her the phone let you talk then hang up after you finished your conversation.

I have fought so much over the last few weeks because somebody needs to be a voice for Ally. Do I want her to have her father in her life? Of course. I was raised with both of my parents and I know that we don't have the best relationship but they are always there for  me. Will I constantly call and text to make you talk to your daughter? Of course not because I don't feel that is responsibility to make you be apart of your daughter's life.

I have made many mistakes over the last four years. I have always tried to make amends and be there for Ally at the end of the day though. I keep her in my every move because everything I do is truly for her. I am only human and I will mess up sometimes but I always try to do the right to start.

I have given J until next weekend to get his things so they are out of the house. There isn't much left here that belongs to him but there is some. I do not regret asking him to leave in the least bit. I removed my daughter and I both from a toxic environment. It was self-destructive to ever invite him back into our lives.

Going forward I am going to revert this blog back to my journey, my sense of peace, Ally, and my crafty projects. I work far too many hours to be dragged into the constant drama and stabs. I am only going to be visiting a select few blogs because I am tired of the childish attitudes. People claim to be adults but cannot act like. I have blocked the people that need to be blocked on every social media outlet I can find.

I am going back to me. The woman that this blog was about. The journey that featured goals and progress. I am going back to the beginning and completely starting over. I can hope this time it turns out correctly.

So please screen shot and call me out but realize that you are chucking stones because you aren't perfect either. You haven't walked a mile in my shoes so stop pretending that you have.

It's already two in the morning and four hours of sleep will prove for a long day. Brightest Blessings for now.

1 comment:

  1. Hugs sweets! And if you don't post anything about J here then no one can run back to him telling him what you posted. I think that will make you life much happier. I know it is nice to be able to vent here but when it does more harm than the venting did good it isn't worth it. We are all here to be your cheerleaders so anything that makes your life better is what we want for you xo


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