My Journey

I am a divorced mother to a beautiful little girl named Ally. Ally and I have had a rough road up to this point but I don't regret a minute of it. I was married for three years, living with him for four. He spent the duration of our marriage with another woman and cheated on me the whole time. While there were moments of happiness it was mostly misery. I developed anxiety, postpartum depression that turned into full blown depression, I gained a lot of stress weight, and I abused my body. I threw away the promise of college and a solid life for myself. I almost died giving birth to my daughter. Through of all that I didn't have much support other than family. The one person I had spent nine years of my life devoting to, spent his time with another woman. They now have a child together and are moving in soon. I am currently rebuilding my life for daughter and I. It has been very trying to explain to my daughter why her father refuses to see her but I have stay determined in remaining positive for her. I will be ceasing contact with him soon altogether. I have learned that I didn't spend much time on making myself happy because I was in an emotionally abusive marriage. Through all of this, I have come out stronger and better for it.


My MIL introduced me into my witchy ways and I will always be forever grateful for her for that. I am still learning and developing now on my own. I have found that I focus better with my incense and that I am strong with Tarot cards. My daughter who is three is an empath and sometimes her abilities get to her. Here recently we have had to do a banishing negativity spell monthly to cleanse the air. She is extremely smart for age and definitely has a kind spirit. I have moments where I feel lost but I do a little research and get back on my feet. 


This little girl right here gives me a reason to breathe. Without her, this new chapter would feel unbearable. She is talented, beautiful, smart, gifted. I could go on and on! I almost lost her at birth. I was alone when they induced me and my ex and his family made it just in time. I fought when they said we were going through with an emergency c-section. I lost three liters of blood during delivery, my epidural didn't kick in, and I passed out. Allisun wasn't breathing at birth and I didn't get to hold her for almost twenty-four hours. She was born on February 23, 2012 at 3:38 PM weight 6 lbs, 7 oz. My ex refused to help out once we were home and the dirt road that his family lived on made it unbearable to stay so I moved back home with my family who helped me heal. I couldn't hardly walk for the first six weeks and missed a lot of time with her.


This photo was taken after we had been living in Fort Worth for almost three months. This is the first time that we were both extremely happy in a long time. I have made mistakes but every mother has. At the end of the day when she calls me mommy I know that I have made the right decision in always fighting for her. We may not have a husband or a Daddy but we'll take the strong love for each other over being miserable any day. I don't know what the future holds but right now, life is good.

2 comments:

  1. Having each other makes it all worth it in the end.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are much stronger than you know!! Keep looking ahead

    ReplyDelete

Encouraging Comments Are Always Welcomed. :)